Let Them Slam Lysol Spray
"Hey, you kids wanna mainline some bleach?" The president offers our nation's senior citizens hope in our most dire of times.
Watch ‘The Back Road,’ An Apocalyptic Doc about Dean Chetwynd’s Dark Art
The doc explores Dean Chetwynd's troubled, abusive childhood and the long journey that brought him to Cottonwood, Arizona, all while making some of the most intriguing, unsettling art in the state.
Guns, Tuition, & Fear: Considering an International Student Perspective
The international students I teach were scared. These horrific murders would scare anyone, but imagine confronting these realities as an outsider here, without a support system and with little understanding of why this keeps happening in the country you’ve chosen to call home for four years ... Why do we always choose the easiest path...
What Dogs Think About While High on Cannabis (Canineabis)
I’m not going to make the jokes about dogs getting the munchies for Milk Bones. That’s stupid.
CHERNOBYL UPDATE: Mutants Are Not Rampaging, Not Eliminating Mankind
I swear to god, every single day another futuristic sci-fi idea gets destroyed by facts. I hate it.
Keep Your Kids Straight and Patriotic by Sending Them to Camp
That’s not a joke; there is a summer camp for the childrens to learn about the ways of the Confederacy, since the northern scumbags that won the war are teaching a version of history that demonizes the noble Southern Man. You can’t even give them the benefit of the doubt and pretend they are legitimately...
Abandoniers! — Who Wants to Buy Santa Claus, AZ? Nobody.
By the time I arrived at Santa Claus, little remained to indicate that it was once a destination, or for that matter, anything at all.
Five Reasons Why Arizona Should Drain Tempe Town Lake
Seriously, the water is disgusting. No one can even swim in it. You can rent an expensive fucking boat to go around in a circle or you just watch it from the "Tempe Beach Park" which is like some sand and some fucking benches. It's hardly a beach.
WikiHole — What Up, Phoenix
I’m sitting here, having just wasted three hours only to remind myself how little I actually know about anything. I’m in awe, once again, at the cyclic nature of humanity, how little has really changed when it comes down to it, and how knowledge is so beautiful.
Another Goodwill, Another 32mb SD Card
Somewhere between the millions of years it took these grand canyons to form and what would appear to be the year 2047 there is, the horseman.
Statement of the Kennel Killer
It was kind of weird putting bodies in garbage bags. it’s not as easy as you would think, even though most of these animals were less than half my size. And corpses are floppy, which, when you’re trying to gracefully slide a creature that was just euthanized into a 40-gallon trash bag from Home Depot,...
Eulogy For Your Internet Fame
You can finally let out all your secrets and the public will completely embrace you in their enthusiastic, mass media bear hug.
